Bricks in Motion
We are a friendly filmmaking community devoted to the art of stop-motion animation using LEGO® and similar construction toys. Here, you can share your work, join our community of other brickfilmers, and participate in periodic animation contests!
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I'm bored at work today, so post some jokes for me 
I'll start with a silly one:
What did the bra say to the hat?
'Go on ahead, I'll give these two a lift'
When's the best time to go to the dentist? Two-thirty! (tooth-thirty)
I wish I knew a joke about monorails, they usually have pretty good one liners.
Heh heh.
A ginger kid got knocked down by a lorry outside my house today. Just think - that could've been me.
But I can't drive a lorry.
So there's this Donut and he is on a boat. Everyday he would ask the captain if he could drive the boat, but he would always be turned down. One day, as usual, he goes up to the captain and says, "Captain, can I drive the boat?" This time the Captain said, "Now Donut, if you ask me if you can drive the boat one more time, you are in big trouble."
That night, the Donut sat in his cabin thinking the situation over. "No," he thought, "I don't care how much trouble I'm getting in. I wanna drive the boat!" So that morning he goes up to the Captain and says, "Captain, can I drive the boat?" The man is very angry now, and says, "IF YOU ASK ME TO DRIVE THIS BOAT ONE MORE TIME I WILL THROW YOU OVERBOARD!!!!" With that, the Donut retreated to his cabin.
That night, the Donut thought the situation over again. "No," he thought, "even if I'm thrown overboard, I still have to drive that boat!" So the next day, he goes up to the Captain and says, "Captain, may I drive the boat?" And then the Captain throws him overboard.
5 chavs all get in two cars; one's a Ford Fiesta, the other, a Renault Clio.
The two drivers then drive them off of a cliff, to see who hits the ground first.
Who wins?
Society.
Behold, the abyss of unfunny that is....the Doctor Doctor Jokes!
Doctor Doctor! I think I need glasses!
You certainly do madam....this is a fish & chips shop
Doctor Doctor! I feel like an Apple!
Hmmm....let me get to the core of that...
Doctor Doctor! I feel like a pin.
Yes, I see your point.
Doctor Doctor! I cant sleep!
Dont worry, just sleep at the end of the bed and you'll soon drop off...
Doctor Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains.
PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER WOMAN!!
I could go on....
Why couldn't Sally swing on the swing?
She was a carrot.
What did the robot say to the centipede?
Stop being a centipede
Wat did they call Napolean after he swallowed a grenade?
Napolean Blownaparte (Blown-apart)
And I seriously was going to make a joke thread, I guess you beat me to it.
I would tell u guys the joke about pizza
but its kinda cheesy........
*A dyslexic man walked into a bra...
*There were three men. Two of them walked into a bar. What did the third one do?
He ducked.]
What did the man do when he couldn't decide which pillow to get?
He went home and slept on it.
1. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.
2. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
3. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
4. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."
I'd tell ya the joke about the airplane but it's over your head!
How many managers does it take to finish a project?
Lemme get back to you on that
Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."
I'm going to have to tell that one to my chemistry teacher!
While I'm here I might as well tell a joke...
A man walks into a bar, what does he say?
Ouch.
And for the more mature jokers:
A man lost his eye in a war, and because of his bing poor, he could only afford a wooden eye as a replacement. He had a tough time finding women to dance with him. But one day, while at a party, he found a woman who was also by herself who had a harelip. He asked if she would dance with him. She gasped with delight. "Would I? Would I?" she asked with glee. The man retorted, "Harelip! Harelip!"
Why couldn't the chair move?
Because it was a lazy chair!
How many cockroaches does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Can't tell. As soon as the light turns on, they scatter!
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