Thanks man, glad you liked it, a vignette would be an awesome idea, if its possible, I'll have to try it out thanks!

Hmm... okay if you really want!

So, you need to improve your sets a little bit. More details and stuff to the rooms and outside. In some shot your animating table shows and that's pretty annoying. Then I DON'T like that you set the FPS lower when people talk and do things with their hands so (I don't like it, but someone maybe does, so I don't know how you would do it )

But... good animating, your walking style is pretty good, some guys don't do their walk cycles so nicely so... good work! The story is nice and nothing bad to say for voice acting for now.

Well... okay, so what I want that you do is improve the sets and be more meticulous when filming!

Could some other people be nice of them and review my movie? I'd really like to know other peoples opinions, as individuals.

Sets were too basic, animation was slow and the aspect ratio is a mess. Also why is the letterbox sepia colored? Also the audio quality is bad, there's way too much background noise. The project seems good, but you need to improve, with that kind of animation people won't watch more than 4 minutes of the film not to mention 40+mins.

Larry... you are right on these but why you sound so rudy thi week?

Please don't take any offence, but the clip as a whole was lacking in many areas. I'll lay out my key thoughts in points:

1. You really need to focus on honing your core animation. A really good thing that Larry pointed out, albeit in a somewhat blunt way, is that if you don't get the animation at the start to be satisfactory, the audience will definitely not hang around to see if it gets any better. It may sound a little harsh, but nobody will want to sit around for 40+minutes watching jittery animation. The arm movements, walking and everything in general (get it? ) needs some degree of improvement.

2. The audio is indeed undesirable, the voice acting could flow a little more with the certain emotions in the lines, but the major problem is the buzzing/static in the background of the voices. It really distracts from what the people are saying. I'd suggest getting either a sock or stocking and putting it over your microphone which will greatly increase the quality. Some editing in an audio program like Audacity or Garage Band would also help a lot too.

3. With the actual dialogue, you really need to cut to the chase. I could have easily shortened the dialogue to at least half of what it was and still gotten across the intended meaning. Some things are unnecessary and tiresome. You want to attract the audience and gain their attention, not to bore them with unnecessary information.

4. The sets certainly need some work. They are bare, and this feeling is particularly exacerbated by the stagnant one angle continuous camera shot. If it were split into a few shots from different directions, it would have made the scene tenfold more interesting. The aspect ratio also needs fixing (try 16:9) as well as the odd sepia tint.

5. Make a short title. People don't remember mouthfuls, it needs to be something short and snappy. Just keep it at Legend of Argonia + maybe another word.

If you manage to put these points into action, I 100% Carousel Guarantee that you'll end up with a film that is light-years ahead of what it is now. Good luck.

Last edited by Carousel (March 10, 2013 (10:43pm))

Hey there Carousel, I really do appreciate you taking your time and listing your points were I have to improve, I do appreciate it, and I will do my best to work on these points you have listed, I will try the sock with the mic thing and hope it works, I think its just the mic I have because when I record there is no background music, so I really don't know whats going on.
Also is the aspect ratio the size of the film, I'm trying to improve on my sets, I'm just sort on baseplates and bricks, so its a little hard atm.
But thanks so much for your time once again, I will try and work on what you have suggested!

Hey Caveman Incorporated Thanks for your comment!
The arm movements probably looked odd for you and others is probably because I believe I took to many shots and put to many hand movements into dialogue, I will aim to fix that in my next film,  I'm glad you enjoyed the sepia for the flashback I was gonna do black and white but I though I'd try sepia.
There was a realtime scene, I just didn't put it in as I didn't get a chance to finish it yet, when I do though I'll definitely add it!
I understand what you mean, as people get bad impressions, by seeing a flashback without knowing what the flashback is about, thanks for your concern and tip, I will get the scene up when I can!

Thank you for enjoying it, and liking it I really, really do appreciate it, seeing a couple nice comments means alot, I will aim to improve, I keep pushing to achieve a better result in my next film.

Thanks man, I personally enjoyed it, as I did put alot of work and heart into it, but I'll try to improve so people can appreciate my work at the same time.

Thanks very much for your replies!

Kind regards, Generalned

Thats true, And thanks alot mate, your encouragement, keeps me highly motivated, cheers for that

Kind regards, Generalned