Yep! It's actually with mcoov right now!

Last edited by WelcomeToAwesomeness (December 4, 2011 (07:15pm))

Mcoov hasn't responded so lil'jj, it's your turn.

I sent mine in. Will it be going to Mcoov and then getting back to order?

Just let me know if I'm the last author.  If so, I assume I should do something to try to make it sound like an ending.  Is that correct?

*cough*mcoov*cough*

Exquisite Corpse: Felix Sit Annus Novus

One morning the yellow soul elephant woke up and realized that something went completely wrong in his life. It is a rare thing to experience such feelings at such an early age, but the young beast knew something had to be done. He tromped down to the kitchen and considered his life as he brewed a melancholy cup of tea. His cat, sensing the mood shift, stayed far back in the shadows as he crossed from the kitchen to the living room. Six horns scraped the ceiling as he walked- scattering dust and plaster onto his head and shoulders-a constant reminder he had bought the house sight unseen. He lifted the mug to his lips and cursed when he saw the dirty flecks of ceiling in it and before he could stop himself he threw the whole thing at the wall. Tiny bits of leaf hung suspended while tendrils of amber snaked down to the floor. His feelings were coming to the surface and he could no longer control them. He sighed and ran a weary claw over his shaggy face while the clock on the mantel struck one. He fell to the floor, exhausted from his transformation. Walking by itself was hard enough, what with his body being humongous now. His cat inched nervously closer to him, scared of the fact his owner was a monster. His master opened his eyes, now glowing red. The cat screeched, it's hair standing on end, and ran behind the couch.

He sat up, feeling nauseous. Before he knew it, his stomach started to heave. He could feel the bile rushing up through his throat, searching for the nearest release point. He tried to hold it back, but it was futile. It came rushing out of his mouth like a raging river, blood speckled in among the bodily fluids. He tried to seal his mouth shut, but then swallowed the copious amount of fresh liquid that appeared. He opened his mouth to scream in pain, but clots of blood mixed with remains of vomit fell out. That was the breaking point, his huge body couldn't take it any longer. The cat screeched as his body fell to the floor, exhausted. Getting agitated with the lack of a reply, he slammed his large, curled fist on the table, rattling the lamp slightly. He breathed a puff of white smoke into the man's face, causing him to cough. The Honcho, to both him and his unfortunate victim's suprise, was starting to lose the nerve that had made him so feared before. The man, held back a chuckle at this discovery. Taking a deep, heavy breath, he said "Alright, listen here. Talk, and I might just let you leave in one piece. However," he stood straight, and pulled back his jacket, revealing a large pistol. "Well, you get the point."

The man’s eyes darted quickly over the Honcho’s sneering face, looking for another sign of weakness.  He saw nothing but decided to take the chance anyway before he lost what little courage he had left.  “All ri-right,” he stammered in a low whisper.  “What I have to say is going to challenge everything you think you know.”  The man paused, covertly noticing the Honcho leaning heavily against the flimsy table to hear every word, his meaty hands grasping its edges.

The man cleared his throat. "I-."
With a loud CRASH the table collapsed under the weight of the Honcho, who let out a loud bellow as he hit the floor.
The man knew this was his chance. Now that the Honcho was down, the time to escape was imminent. He dashed out the door, pausing only briefly to retrieve his coat and hat. With one last rueful glance at the man he once called brother, Hector departed. The GPS system growled to life as the car rocketed along the highway.  Hector glanced at the estimated arrival time flashing on the screen and pushed the pedal down closer to the floor. He wasn't going to be late - he couldn't be late. The balloon factory loomed in the distance - a kaleidoscopic pinwheel of color radiating between two sandstone cliffs. Hector cleared his throat again.
    "I..." A nervous twitch moved his eyebrow in stuttering snaps.
    "I...have to...know... where I came from." White knuckles pale against the splendor of the imposing buildings he pulled into the factory parking lot. Placing the red, bulbous, foam sphere on the tip of his own nose he exited the vehicle. Hector walked up to the balloon factory with apprehension. He knew that this was the place, he was just scared at what he would encounter inside. Step by step, he walked closer and closer to the main door. He took a deep breath, then extended his hand to shove it open. He paused for a second, thinking of the danger within, then his hand continued it's pre-destined course. The door made a long creaking noise, and opened up a few inches. He peered inside, looking through the small crack between the door frame and the door. He gasped, what was inside was not what he expected at all.

The clangor was followed by a long, piercing, maniacal laugh, and it was coming from behind yet another door.There was nothing sophisticated here, just a simple, round, brass knob. Bringing his hand to turn it, he knew that he was entering the very lair of evil itself. Khan, Voldemort, Cthulhu, they were all nothing compared to the danger that this evil proposed to the world. The very fate of half the galaxy was at stake.
Hand on the knob, and drenched in sweat, he turned it and ever so slowly pushed the door open.
There it was, the very essence of evil, sitting behind a large mahogany desk, in a tall, blue office chair, looking through a cathedral-like glass window at its work.
Then the chair rotated to face him, and sitting in it was a sight that Hector would never have expected in his entire life, one that made him nearly drop his loaded gun: the infamous Pinkamina Diane Pie.  With wide eyes and a gaping grin, she suddenly rose and began to move towards Hector.  The boinging of her menacing approach was interrupted by her giggling, “Ooh, I’m so totally superly excited to see you!”  Then she laughed the horrific laughter once again.
     Hector backed up and screamed, “You will not stop me!  I have a tranquilizer gun…”
     “Ooh goody!  I never leave home without a party cannon, myself.  Come on, Mr. Grumpy Pants.  You look like you need a cupcake!”  The pink monster bounced even closer.  Hector could now see that an open basket hung around her neck holding a frighteningly gooey chocolate cupcake.   
     Hector shrieked and fired the gun hitting Pinkamina Diane Pie on the neck.
     “Ooh, is this a game?  I just love games.  Is it darts, or tag, or pin the tail on the pony…no that’s silly I already have a tail and you were nowhere near it anyway unless you are a naturally bad shot but then maybe…” The pink demon took a deep breath to continue.
     “I give up!” sobbed Hector.  “There’s just no way I can defeat you!”
     “Don’t you mean ‘dehooves’?  I got de tail, de mane, de hooves…!” and she began laughing hysterically, when she abruptly stopped. “Here, have a cupcake!”  She grinned and thrust the basket into hector’s shaking hands.
     Hector sighed sadly and gingerly took a bite.  “Hey!”  he smiled.  “This isn’t half bad.” He greedily jammed the rest of the cupcake into his mouth.
     “Everypony knows,” giggled Pinkie Pie, “that you just can’t be all gloomy doomy dumpy poo with a cupcake in your tummy and a song in your heart.”  Suddenly the air was filled with music and balloons as Hector and Pinkie Pie bounced happily out of the room together.

Fin

THANK YOU FOR PARTICIPATING EVERYONE

Last edited by WelcomeToAwesomeness (January 13, 2012 (01:56am))

Thanks for organizing this, WTA.  It is a very...um...interesting and humorous story.  I'm wondering how we got from a collapsing, transforming, and vomiting "elephant" to a Honcho threatening a man, lol.  The weird thing is that after that point, the story almost makes some sense!   

This was a lot of fun!  I hope we try it again sometime.

Last edited by Brick7 (January 13, 2012 (12:21pm))

Bwahaha, I'm surprised it took that long in the story to dissolve into pony.

An excellent tale.