ok i have this idea that i will post down below this about a aline criminal that takes over this place so yay ill here is the story(i need help with the rest of it)

Two guys are talking in a room. Then the commander comes up and says "hows it going men?"
One of the guys (spacemen) named sid says "very good sir"
"good" says the commander "there has been a breach at sector 16 in the apsuradis system on a planet called luna""all there is on the planet is a huge jail that they keep there prisoners till death, an alien crimanal has gotten loos, and taken over the whole planet there since he killed every one else" says the commander
"so why are you telling us" said sid
"well we need you, sid, to go to luna and catch that crook, be carful hes very dangrous"
"yes sir!"
"ok you leave tommarow morning"
"ok sir"

Then now a ship is coming down on a planets surface (sid's ship). He gets out of the ship and walks into the entrance.
he comes into a long hall way, he walks very slowly and looks in to each room,he there finds skelotens and dead bodys of crimanals and guards. he looks into another room and he sees the alien, hes on a computer talking to another alien (his leader). sid watches and listens to the alien (there will be subtitles to what there saying). on the last subtitle the computer alien say "whos that over there?" the real alien in the room turns around and sees sid. Sid then turns around and puts his back to the wall gasping.

Now i need you guys to help me finish the story because i cant think of what to do (im not good at making endings, i just make them like the crimanal gets capture blah blah blah. every one does that, so i need you guys!)

here are some of my ideas:
1.there will be a fight scene and the guy kills the crimanal and he goes over to the computer and finds out he sent ships to the planet
2.he runs away from the alien
3.thats all i have so please give some ideas what i can do and change for this story

Last edited by flchorton (February 6, 2010 (06:41am))

By UniLego