• Joined: September 10, 2010

Topic: Teleport (Update Thread)

Hey guys!

I'm Scripting an upcoming film and possible series. I wanted to get you'r guys thought on the concept and see if you could give me any tips or feedback.

An ordinary man is faced with a life threatening situation and finds he has the ability to teleport. he sees all the crime and filth in his city and decides to use his ability's to clean the city of crime. But being the ordinary man he is, he lacks the skills to get things done and ends up almost getting himself killed. seriously injured he is sent spiraling done the path of revenge. seeking to eradicate crime and slowly building his skills up. Trying to find the man that almost killed him.


Update (2/9/13)

So today I decsided to try and come up with a character design and I think I found one. What do you guys think?

http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8229/8458041916_50c61629c3_z.jpg

http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8102/8458021330_6364da1c84_z.jpg

Last edited by Clonecam (February 8, 2013 (11:39pm))

Clonecam's Website

  • Joined: April 20, 2012

Re: Teleport (Update Thread)

Hum, I liked the script, it seem very nice, since it be well executed. About the character, I think the second one is looking like the vilain, but depending on the way that you'll use it, can be fine.

--Sandwïch, sir?--

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Pachest's Website

  • Location: United States
  • Joined: June 21, 2011

Re: Teleport (Update Thread)

Sorry, didn't see this before.

The story sounds kinda interesting, and depending on how you execute it, it could be pretty cool.
Teleporting, while at first it sounds good, is a mixed bag while fighting crime. It's not super-strength, allowing you to just wade in with no style or form. It's not control of fire or shooting lasers that could be guided from a safe distance. And it's not super-fast reflexes allowing you to avoid harmful circumstances. And depending on his overall control over it, things could go from bad to worse for him in seconds. It's something that an average Joe would think "Sweet, now I can go out and fight crime!" and then shortly later find out the hard, cold truth.

So I saw all that to say this, that's a fantastic power choice for this guy.

I like that character design, it gives off a cool "anti-hero" vibe, but the balance is perfect for a flawed character descending into a vengeful knight.

Just don't get too ambitious with it just yet. I suggest making the first episode be more-or-less self-contained, so if you decide not to continue the series, viewers won't be left hanging. I've done that a time of two, and it's best not to over-expand this things until you're sure that you will continue/finish it.

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Pritchard Studios's Website

  • Joined: September 10, 2010

Re: Teleport (Update Thread)

Thanks guys, i'll definitely keep that in mind Pritchard.
Today I thought I would see how I would handle the whole teleporting effect and created this Test

*This was also the first time I have attempted camera movement*

Clonecam's Website

  • Location: Middle Zealand
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Re: Teleport (Update Thread)

This reminds me of the movie Kickass, except you're character actually has some sort of special power. I like the character a lot; I think he should start out without the glasses, and then don them when he goes all vengeful. I can really see this project going somewhere interesting, I'm looking forward to it. mini/smile

https://farm8.staticflickr.com/7340/16345454720_e04c98539a.jpg
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  • Location: United States
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Re: Teleport (Update Thread)

Clonecam, great job on the teleport test.
I wouldn't change a thing.

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