Avatar

Oh boy.....

Well, if you remove all the hype, its enjoyable. Its a movie that skips being good and tries too hard to be genius - ignoring basic and simple things that need to be right before the movie can be considered a classic. It also uses so many clichés I was expecting Jake's dad to be the corporation guy. But the music is really good, and the action is decent (overlooking all the clichés and the knife wielding mech) Its a popcorn movie at its very best.

However, this movie is CRAP compared to what it claims to be. Visually, its ground breaking - but pretty images only get you so far. A story carries a movie, not visual effects. I tried to keep a count on unnecessary eye-candy shots. They should have had text over these scenes saying "THIS MOVIE IS THE MOST AWESOME THING YOU WILL EVER ENCOUNTER IN YOUR LIFE!! MARVEL AT ITS INCREDIBLE EFFECTS!! JAMES CAMERON IS GOD!! THIS MOVIE IS AWESOME!! DID I MENTION THIS MOVIE IS AWESOME!!"

At times it gets ridiculous. Do we really need to see the entire journey to the place of the bat-things? There is no exposition (which the movie needs) no development (which the movie needs) just five minutes of pointless eye candy. I know your trying to create atmosphere - but you've got enough TWO SCENES LATER, and you had atmosphere about THREE SCENES AGO before your Rocky-Montage (the only thing missing was some 80's power music) And the montage actually has more eye candy than Jake lifting dumbbells and doing press-ups. Its so ridiculous its hilarious.

And there is science fiction, and then there is bullcrap. Mystical flying mountains? Mental links into living creatures? (what happens if you connect your USB hair with someone else's USB hair? Is it like Na'vi sex?) And what are those Jellyfish flower things that surround Jake? What does it mean if they surround you? Why wont anyone explain?

Why do they instantly think Jake is dangerous? He looks exactly like everyone else! Doe he just smell funny? Why is it that out of an entire planet, there is only one tree that has the expensive stuff? What does the stuff do? Where is Pandora? AND WHY DOESN'T JAKE JUST TELL EVERYONE THE BIG BAD HUMANS ARE COMING!?! He looks so shocked when they arrive, but he's had weeks! Why is our protagonist a big hairy IDIOT?! And why does the Na'vi whore suddenly start to like Jake? One moment she's slapping him across the face, the next their making out in the mystical tree-thingy?? Did I miss something?

And don't get me started on the two antagonists. You have that guy who plays an annoying, arrogant jacka$$ boss in every movie he is in - who is so clichéd he has HIS OWN PUTTING RUN so that we know instantly he's a jacka$$. Because its not obvious enough already! And then you have every bada$$ general in every movie rolled into one and then crapped out. This guy is like "I like my scars...their kinda pretty dontcha think?" and as if he's not obvious enough, you get him giving lectures saying stuff like "YOUR NOT IN KANSAS ANYMORE!!" and "WE'RE FIGHTING FEAR WITH FEAR" (WHAT FEAR??) I think Cameron spent ten years thinking of all the ways he can make both these guys as over the top as possible.

And the story......I fart better stories. 'Iron Man' had a better script, and each scene from that movie was written ten minutes before it was shot - not ten years. Sure, the concept of 'Avatars' is interesting, but its not exploited and its more flawed than the economy. Surely someone would have noticed Jakes lifeless body lying around somewhere? And I thought it was implied that the Na'vi (VERY ORIGINAL NAME FOR BLUE PEOPLE BY THE WAY) that they knew he was being controlled remotely. Surely they know that the other woman is an Avatar, which is why they wont let her speak? Why else wont they let her speak? And the other Avatar is a waste of animation, no lasting impact other than the fact he leaves no lasting impact.

But I'm kicking a dead horse here. Many people accuse 'District 9' of being unoriginal - but that movie is like 'Star Wars' in its concept. It takes every idea done before and yet by doing this somehow creates something entirely new. This movie however just fails at everything other than visuals and music - but even the music is clichéd with long chords during the typical slow motion shot where EVERYONE DIES, children's choirs during any scene with eye candy (which is a lot) to emphasise its beauty and innocence, and tribal music to show how the Na'vi are basic in their ways despite the fact they have a GOD ON THEIR SIDE!!

A god that listens to someone's prayers? Rubbish! (Religious flame war in 5...4....3...2....1....)

Oh, and James Cameron even rips his own idea off by getting a popular female singer to do a theme tune for his movie - as if he thinks it will make the movie instantly better than 'Titanic'. However, the song is without a doubt the most easily forgotten song in the world. I forgot how the verse went before the chorus started - and I cant even remember that now.

Lets hope everyone just forgets about the entire movie. I'm going to start right now.

-MRB

Oh, in my hate (which was as always slightly uncalled for) I forgot:

Monty Python: And Now For Something Completely Different

It was hilarious. Though, I do prefer the original 'Flying Circus' Sketches, but the movie adapts the sketches in a different and interesting way (particularly the great merging of the Parrot Sketch and the Lumberjack song. And I always crack up on the line "THIS....IS AN EX-PARROT!!")

It knows what it is and it doesn't try to improve. Its miraculously low budget production design makes it unique and very 'Impaired-esque'. Its shocking to realise how much I base MSI off of Monty Python by accident.

-MRB

Last edited by Max Butcher (May 7, 2010 (12:14pm))

lord of the rings the two towers! That movie rocks! I watched it more as 5 times...

Max, I can respect that you dislike Avatar, I really can. But that's probably the single worst analysis I've seen on it.

I don't see the problem with the floating mountain/hair queue thing. This is not only just sci-fi, but fantasy as well, you can cut it a little slack. And, for the record, for the record, Pandora has lower gravity (as mentioned by Quaritch), and I think the Unobtanium deposits in the ground cause a magnetic field that lift parts of the planet up (which also would explain why the helicopter gadets go offline in that area).

Is it that difficult to infer? Having had a few examples of the connection of Na'vi-to-beast interaction and that it seemingly connects both creatures on a sort of nervous-system-type way, I assume that there's probably a level of intimacy to it when a couple connects.

Were you paying attention at all? Neytiri partly explains it, but the movie also sort of relies on you to determine their significance to the Na'vi based on her immediate reaction (both when the sprites land on Jake and when it lands on the end of her arrowhead).

Given that this is a movie whose appeal lies in the overall visual and aural experience, I wouldn't blame James Cameron for wanting to take the time to explore his own planet, if only for that sake.

Again, were you paying even the slightest bit of attention?  This wasn't the first time the Na'vi have encountered Avatars before. Plus, notice how Jake was clothed like a human, had five fingers (as opposed to the regular 4), spoke a different accent, didn't know the Na'vi language, etc. Doesn't take a genius to figure out he's an Avatar working with the humans.

For a guy who complains that Avatar's story is too simple and unoriginal, a lot of this seems to have gone way over your head.

It's not that Hometree is the only source of the mineral, it's just that it sits on top of the biggest deposit on the planet. Of course they'd go after it.

It's a fake planet, bro. Do you really think that pointing out where the galaxy is in the universe would have the slightest bit of relevance to anything?

This part's a bit shaky, yeah. But, then again, don't forget that Jake starts out working for the military by giving them reconnaissance on Hometree's structure. The Na'vi likely would have killed him on the spot if they figured out he was giving them up (which they almost do when he admits it. The only reason Jake and Grace live is because of the attack on Hometree).

Yes, the entire middle-section of the film.

This is a bit more understandable, but then again, this isn't a really unique storyline. A story like this calls for villains we have to come to hate, and the movie at least accomplishes that (this is a very good vs. evil type deal).

About the "fight terror with terror" quote, I think that's sort of supposed to be a rip on George Bush. That was a bit too obvious for my liking, yeah.

It was the technology that took that long, not the script treatment. Plus, though a lot of the dialogue in Iron Man was improvised, I assume they had an outline of what they wanted for each scene going into it.

The Na'vi know they're fake, which is why they are hesitant to trust them. Being that they're not very technology-savvy, I wouldn't expect them to know the specifics of how they're made/controlled, only that they are fake creatures (as evidenced when Jake passes out and Tsu'tey almost slashes his throat immediately after). What's your point?

Knowing that she is a "fake" Na'vi who lives/works with the humans, I don't imagine why they would have any reason to fully trust her.

Are you implying that Star Wars has an original storyline? And Avatar didn't do this by creating its own species, planet, language, animals, plant-life, etc., just like what Star Wars did on a more universal scale?

That I can agree with you on.

Last edited by MindGame (May 7, 2010 (07:18pm))

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Lurk more.

Yes, I was.

But here is my point - a movie shouldn't need to be analysed and watched over and over again to be understood. Movies should be digestible in one go. Normally I only even need to watch a movie once to fully understand it. And I went into watching this movie again with an open mind determined to be proven wrong and come back here saying "This movie is actually pretty good". I had all the questions ready to be answered....but they were not.

Sure, when you analyse them and use LOTS of logic, you can draw a very vague answer - which I tried to do. But I don't want vague answers. I don't want forums of people debating over what those jellyfish things mean - you should know what they mean right away. Many people complain 'The Dark Knight' had too much exposition, but I like that because NOTHING IS QUESTIONED. You can walk out of the movie feeling good because you fully understand and therefore enjoy the movie without spending hours thinking about it or being a rocket scientist. It gave you all the answers without shoving it in your face or being patronising, yet made it as digestible and easy as possible. It annoys the hell out of me when you have to stop the movie, re-wind (Which I DID DO on several occasions) and watch again to try and understand it. Then you sit there with Sam Worthington's hairy head paused in mid-speech and actually have to think about it.

Never have I ever had to do that in a movie. You shouldn't have to think about and analyse it like your Einstein, you should be able to walk out of the movie the first time round and be able to understand it. Thats what I hate about this movie so much. That despite how much I don't like it, I have to put so much effort into it. Its like Maths. I HATE MATHS - yet I'm having to put more effort into passing it than any other subject I am doing.

This isn't enjoyable. A movie is an escape from reality, an opportunity to clear your mind, relax, and enjoy. But this movie is a CHORE. Its like doing homework. Its not an escape, its a return to reality. Why do I need to waste my time trying to understand this movie?

Does she? I swear all she says is something like "There was a sign!" Sure, we know their a sign now - but what does the sign mean? We know Na'vi are buried with one of them, which tells us.....nothing.

Yes, you can use logic, and I understand why you would be suspicious because he's wearing different clothes (and I never noticed he had five fingers. I know your probably going to slap me round the face and call me a moron for not noticing, but why should I have to go into all the effort of pausing the movie and pressing my face against the screen? Surely they should have pointed it out, like "He is not one of us, look! *holds up Jakes hand* he has five fingers!")

But:

The thing is, if the Na'vi knew Jake was an Avatar.....why are they so shocked when he collapses lifeless? Why is Neytiri so worried when Jake wont wake up? Why is everyone so shocked that the other woman (keep forgetting her name, sorry) also falls lifeless? Why wouldn't they just kill Jake on the spot if they knew what he was?

My point is: I have no clue if the Na'vi know or not! There is your logic which says they already know, but their is my logic which says they don't know until the general stops the project. Your logic makes sense to a degree, but I believe mine does too because I'm an arrogant twit. So which is right? This would all be solved with just one or two extra lines of dialogue. Why does this movie need to be so cryptic?

If by middle section you mean 'Rocky-Montage' (which is basically the entire 'Middle' of the movie). But yeah, they did seem to be bonding during the montage. I take back that complaint.

Did you research that? If you did, I would like to know the website. Either that or your just clever - unlike me.

No. I'm implying that Star Wars took every idea already done and somehow made it into something fresh and fun. Sure, its unoriginal, but....it just works. I have no idea why, it just does. Avatar doesn't work. Star Wars was just trying to get a cinema release - Avatar tries so desperately to be the greatest movie of all time. The problem is it tries way too hard.

And I used to have my own fantasy/Sci-Fi world. I even had an entire wall of my room covered in sketches of Animals, plant life, space ships, planets etc. Sure, it was the most unoriginal in the world, but I'm sure if I returned to them now I could make a few alterations here and there and BINGO - I present to you: Avatar! Now lets release it on DVD without any features! $$

Oh, and anyone can come up with nonsense and claim it to be a different language. Ben Stiller spoke better Na'vi-ish...and that was improvised on the spot. And yes, the same could be said for Star Wars.....but that....just.....worked. It was just used right and this was used wrong.

Your other explanations I get and accept. I understand that in my rage I get carried away, and I apologise. This is why I'm NOT a film critic...

-MRB

Last edited by Max Butcher (May 8, 2010 (03:54am))

The movie was long, and it takes a compelling story to keep me interested, not spiffy special effects.

GIANT ALIEN BANANAS FROM OUTER SPACE UPDATE THREAD!

Kick Ass

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The Trip - BRAWL 2012

Maybe it's just me and my super enhanced brain, but I understood the whole movie in one go.